My New Year’s Resolutions: – Put Decaf In The Coffee…

My New Year’s Resolutions:

– Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso .

– In The Memo Field Of All My Checks, Write ” For Smuggling Diamonds”

– Finish All My sentences with “In Accordance With The Prophecy.”

– Don’t use any punctuation

– As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

– Order a Diet Water whenever I go out to eat, with a serious face.

– Mosquito Netting Around My Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

– My Co-workers Shall Address Me By My Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

– When The Money Comes Out The ATM, I’ll Scream “I Won!, I Won!”

– When Leaving The Zoo, I’ll Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling
“Run For Your Lives, They’re Loose!!”

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